I need to calm down

The big party is in 2 days. Most of the cooking is done. I need to clean the house and set up things inside the tent. Juergen is taking a half day off tomorrow. Really, it should be fine. I guess it's like everything else I do. I clean the kitchen, but it doesn't stay clean. I vacuumed the floors but they get dirty fast. So most everything will need to be done again on Saturday. But Saturday I'm also cooking the rice, potato's and noodles. I'm finishing the dishes I've made this week. So I wish I could clean now and trust it would stay clean. But that's just not my reality. I'm sure Juergen and Nicole will help me finish the work in time for the party. And I really hope I can calm down and manage to enjoy the whole event. Next time I'm having a pot luck. I'm not sorry I cooked all week. You only turn 50 once. But I don't think I'll ever do this again. The weather isn’t very good either. I wish it was warmer and clearer. I don’t think people will want to spend too much time in the garden. I hope it manages to “flow” well. There are really interesting people coming. I should just trust them to make fun for themselves. Why in the world do I think I’m responsible for the whole groups fun? They are amazing people…they can enjoy them selves just fine with out my help! Oh Amy…you need to relax! This will be a very good party. Where is your faith women?