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I know that my redeemer lives

I've been thinking allot about the statement by Bill Johnson, "The only right/ claim we have to the past is the testimony of what God has done". I get so much joy just letting go of all that is behind me. That may sound strange to you, I've had a pretty good life. But I'm thinking so much lately about Jessica. Autism has robbed Jessica of a good deal of her child hood. She has never had a friend, never been invited to a birthday party, never gone to camp, could not even attend church. That may not seem like a loss to you, but I use to be a pastor and it is not what I had dreamed of for my first born child. If I were to dwell on this loss, it could eat me alive. No. I will not hold on to this, I agree with Bill Johnson, I have no right to this past! It is gone. The only thing I have a right to is the testimony of a very good God that carried us all these years, who saved Jessica's life when she was born with 4 different heart defects, who kept Jeurgen and I together even when 85 % of all couples with an autistic child break up. I will not fix my eyes on what I lost, but what I have. And I will fix my eyes on my hope...my hope is in God who made the heaven and the earth. Nothing is impossible for Him. The video is "I know that my redeemer lives " in German. The drummer is a good friend Daniel (he taught Thomas for awhile). It's written and sung by Lothar Kosse.


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