I called my parents today to tell them what's going on. The conversation went something like this.
"Hi Mom"
"Hi Amy, what is new"?
"Did you read my blog"?
"I was not home yesterday"
"Oh, well...I might have cancer"!
"Oh, you say that so casually"
…..How do you say it? How do you even wrap your brain around the idea? I have to wait for two weeks to find out what is going on. Some how I have make peace with the possibility. There are two people in my Moms church that have Hodgkin’s. Both are doing very well. I hope it is nothing. My mom says I should think the best. I do hope for the best but I have to be mentally able to handle the worst. If I can have peace with what ever happens, I hope I will just relax. Believe me; I'm hoping it's nothing! I would be so relieved!!! But what would I do two weeks from now if the doctor does use the “C” word and I was totally caught off guard. I think what I’m trying to do is just prepare for a storm that may or may not come. I’m putting down mental sand bags, and nailing wood over the windows. If the storm passes me by, well Praise God! But if the storm hits me dead on…I want to be prepared. I have to be able to stand up…I can not get blown away! How do you prepare for a storm? I run to God and make sure I'm really holding on tight to him. There is no other place I want to be. I will surround myself with my Rock and my Shield.
"Hi Mom"
"Hi Amy, what is new"?
"Did you read my blog"?
"I was not home yesterday"
"Oh, well...I might have cancer"!
"Oh, you say that so casually"
…..How do you say it? How do you even wrap your brain around the idea? I have to wait for two weeks to find out what is going on. Some how I have make peace with the possibility. There are two people in my Moms church that have Hodgkin’s. Both are doing very well. I hope it is nothing. My mom says I should think the best. I do hope for the best but I have to be mentally able to handle the worst. If I can have peace with what ever happens, I hope I will just relax. Believe me; I'm hoping it's nothing! I would be so relieved!!! But what would I do two weeks from now if the doctor does use the “C” word and I was totally caught off guard. I think what I’m trying to do is just prepare for a storm that may or may not come. I’m putting down mental sand bags, and nailing wood over the windows. If the storm passes me by, well Praise God! But if the storm hits me dead on…I want to be prepared. I have to be able to stand up…I can not get blown away! How do you prepare for a storm? I run to God and make sure I'm really holding on tight to him. There is no other place I want to be. I will surround myself with my Rock and my Shield.
Comments
Big hug
Birgit